I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
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