she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
