oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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