tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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