so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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