Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
