Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
