he told me I talked like a deaf person
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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