yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
