When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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