my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
