I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I got inside last night via doggy door
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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