I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
