im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
