Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize
