I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
