Plan B is the new Plan A
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
