just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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