I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
