He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize
