I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize