My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
what the fuck happened to the tacos
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize