yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
