Where is the hickey?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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