maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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