i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Randomize
