i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
