this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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