Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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