Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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