About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
