What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
