I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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