I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
