We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
