My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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