Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize