This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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