Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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