I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize