Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Randomize
