i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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