But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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