remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
