talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
