she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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