And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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