you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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