Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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