the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Randomize
